Mark Therriault

When I was a teenager, I was a popular kid that excelled in sports, but I never felt safe in my own skin (20 years later….and still working on it). I was raised by a single father who had a short temper and was incredibly strict. Fear was the method of rule in our home. Alcohol became an avenue for me to escape those feelings of fear. It gave me the confidence I didn’t have, took me out of my head and decreased my anxiety (which I’ve always had a lot of).

This continued into University, where I was more focused on going out and hanging out with friends than I was on getting an education. I can remember many starts of semesters when I thought to myself, ”Ok this semester, you aren’t going to drink. You are going to apply yourself and see what you are capable of”. It usually lasted maybe 1 or 2 days, at most, before I was back to living as I had before.
 

“Right about the time my life was supposed to be taking off, I was moving in the other direction.”

Always disappointed in myself, but with the excuse in my head that I would get my act together at some point in the future. I graduated from University and moved back to Vancouver. I was lucky enough to find a small firm that I wanted to work at. I was hired after a few months, and figured; “Ok, now I’m in the real world, the partying and abusing needs to stop”, but ironically it was the complete opposite. I had started abusing harder drugs and right about the time my life was supposed to be taking off, I was moving in the other direction.

It became hell on earth, and drugs were consuming me. I wasn’t able to function without them, and as each day went on, the shame, guilt and hopelessness grew. After a year of working, I was in $50,000 of debt. I had abused all my friends’ trust, my parents, everyone I knew I had borrowed money from, and had even stolen money from my dad. Each paycheck I was going to Money Mart, as I had gone into a cycle of needing more money than I had and borrowing it at insane rates.

“I would trade my life with anyone of these people. It was as if I was in a different world than everyone else.”

I was 26 and thinking of ways that I could commit suicide. I wanted to make it look like an accident so that no one would know that I was intentionally dying. I still cared about how others perceived me, and little about how I was doing myself (This has been a constant in my life). I was alone and hiding, with no hope in sight. I can remember walking on a beautiful sunny day in the summer of 2006, having finished work, desperate to escape and looking at people on patios with friends, thinking I would trade my life with anyone of these people. I still barely had a job, and a roof over my head, but it was as if I was in a different world than everyone else.

“I needed to go to rehab, I couldn’t keep living like this.”

A few weeks later, as I sat in a field, having left work because I wasn’t able to stop crying, I called my mom, and told her what was really going on. I needed to go to rehab, I couldn’t keep living like this. She took me to detox, and on the first night, as I was detoxing and not able to sleep, with others puking around me in a room of beds, I ran away. I couldn’t deal with this now I thought. I eventually called my dad, who came and picked me up. Although I had gotten to use another day, I cried all the way home. My dad wasn’t angry like he usually would have been, he was too devastated at seeing his son in this condition.

The next day we found a rehabilitation centre. Although there was a waitlist, and it needed to be government funded, my dad said he would pay for it and figured out a way to get me in. I slept on the couch for the first week, as there were no beds, often running out to the front yard to puke. I had cold chills, and would think at night about just walking out the door like I had in the detox center, but thankfully, for whatever reason, I decided to stay, and eventually finished the 60 day program.
 

“I had faced my demons and was ready to finally see what I was capable of.”

I got out of rehab, with nothing to my name, other than, gratefully, a company that had decided to keep me employed as I went to get help. I came back demoted as an assistant to the assistant, but I was just happy to have a job. The difference now was I had finally faced my demons and was ready to finally see what I was capable of. I had to win back the trust of my colleagues and others, but I was determined to do so. I had learned new tools and understood myself a little better. I was introduced to self-work, and so many wonderful things.

“In 10 years, I compltely transformed my life.”

I wrote audacious 5 year goals, and made the decision that everything I would do from now on would be aligned with accomplishing those goals. I was completely sober, and nothing was going to get in the way, although plenty of things tried, but I just figured out ways to get through those barriers.

“I went from detoxing in rehab, completely broke to multi-millionaire.”

In 10 years, I completely transformed my life. I went from detoxing in rehab and being completely broke, to becoming a multi-millionaire. I went from an employee, to a successful entrepreneur, to one of the top Advisors in Canada, to a Vice President all with the same firm. A firm that stuck by me and provided me with the support I needed to get better. When I left for rehab at 26, I didn’t believe I would ever be a successful and contributing member of the company. I didn’t even believe that option existed for me.

I climbed three 20,000+ ft peaks, all for charity, raising over $150,000 to help bring education, shelter, and nourishment to kids. I’ve travelled to over 25 countries and have had so many incredible adventures along the way. You see, I told you I was blessed ;)

“The accomplishments didn’t make “I’m not good enough” disappear like I thought it would.”

Sounds great doesn’t it, but here’s the truth about this rags to riches story. Even after I accomplished all these goals that I thought would take my whole lifetime to accomplish, I still found ways to suffer, mess up and not trust myself. I thought all the things above would have made me happy, but the truth is I still felt like that insecure teenager, that needed to hide, only now the shadow was even bigger. I was accomplished, and became attached to the idea that my success, or the perception of success was more important to that of how I actually felt about myself. All the accomplishments didn’t make the story of “I’m not good enough” disappear like I thought it would.

“From the depths of hell and hopelessness, to a successful multi-millionaire.”

You see when I went to rehab, I wrote a letter to myself which I got to read to my family a year after sobriety. In that letter, there was a story about a young man that would go from the depths of hell and hopelessness, to a successful multi-millionaire.

“He would then go on to share that message in the hope of helping others.”

And after he figured a way to get there, he would then go on to share that message with others in the hope of helping others that might have the same dream, and who may have also had similar struggles in their life.

That’s why I’m here, I’ve put in 13 years of work setting the groundwork to have a story worth telling, and a message that I hope will inspire others to change their lives like I did. It’s the only thing in my life that has been so clear for so long. It’s my purpose, and what has driven me to be as successful as I have been in other areas of my life. It’s what has kept me coming back to the right path when I have slipped, and as you will learn, I have failed way more than I have succeeded, but I’ve still managed to get to where I am today.

Thanks for coming along this journey with me, and if you’re thinking, wow what a story, this is only scratching the surface…My greatest accomplishment in life actually came after all the success and money, because that journey is what has finally started to set me free…